Sunday, May 23, 2010

Karen

When I was 20 years old, I got pregnant. I wasn’t married, and I was really scared. I didn’t live at home anymore, but I knew that I would have to tell my Mom and Dad what was about to happen. I kept quiet about it for a long time, but when I finally came to terms with the fact that I was going to have a baby, I knew I had to tell my Mom first. Mom would understand…she’s a Mom, and she’s a woman. It’s funny, because she was most upset because she was “too young” to be a grandma. That was funny to me, because she was too young to have ever gotten married when she did, at age 16, so unless I waited until I was 40 to have a baby, she was always going to be “too young” to be a grandma. The next challenge was to tell my Dad. I was his first born child, and he and I were always close. I went fishing with Dad, I went to his softball games. He would dance with me standing on his feet on Saturday night before he and Mom went out for the evening. How was I going to tell him that I was pregnant?

Well, I guess Mom did that for me. I remember them showing up at my place of work at the end of the day, sitting in the car in the parking lot, waiting for me. I didn’t know what was going to happen. I was so afraid that Dad would disown me – that was a word that was used back then. Of course, he never owned me to begin with, and we know better in 2010, don’t we? I was so sad that I was disappointing him. That’s what he said…he was disappointed in me. It broke my heart!

But, we moved forward and made plans to begin our lives with a new baby. Not long before I was due to deliver, there was a special card from Dad and I remember what the message was. He said we all make mistake in our lives and that we should learn from them. He wanted me to know that he loved me and that he loved the new child that I was carrying. He wanted me to know that we are all family, and we take care of one another.

And he did. My son was the first grandchild in Mom and Dad’s family and everybody loved him. I got married a few years later and went on to have another child and that son is every bit as special as the first one. I love the way they have grown up and become two extraordinary men, each one different in their life-styles, but both loving and caring individuals. And they both love their mother…they even tell me that!

I’ve been fortunate to have many children touch my life, wonderful step-children, nieces and nephews, cousins and now grandchildren. I’m one of those people who cry at babies…like people who cry at weddings, I cry at babies. We have a grandson who is 10 years old, and when we recently learned that we have another grandson in our family…my heart filled with joy! I’m looking forward to spending time with him and his Momma and Daddy, and to making up for years lost.

Dad was right, we make mistakes, but we learn from them, and we move on. We know that family is the most important thing in our lives and we need to keep those bonds strong…forever.

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